We have considered replacing
our poor old vacuum cleaner
with its frayed cord
that won’t retract properly
and the handle that falls off
if you don’t cradle it just so,
and it does have a tendency to
pull to the left
and has been known to fart dust
from a sneaky slit in the hose
if you don’t squeeze it.
I could list other endearing
qualities, but somehow
telling seems like infidelity.
These quirks are our
secret. It’s not a shameful secret
nor is it a dirty little secret:
it’s more of a state secret
for our eyes only.
So don’t tell anybody.
Especially a vacuum salesman;
first things first:
the TV picture is a strange shade of green
the kitchen table wobbles
the steam iron sounds orgasmic
the toaster throws burnt toast
across the room
but more important
our espresso machine has given up the ghost
and we’re looking for a new one.
