He had several theories about why he couldn’t talk to women:
he could not look one in the eye
without thinking she could read his mind
and would be totally scandalized;
women talk face-to-face,
and men talk side-by-side;
the beauty of women
made his eyes water so he couldn’t see;
women thought so fast
his slow thoughts were torture
for them, and for him;
the Mars/Venus theory,
the fights of his parents,
the impossibility that any woman
could ever love him
or anyone like him.

He was somewhat surprised
when he finally, by accident
he was sure, did land a
perfectly amazing girlfriend,
that she was perfectly content
to spend as much time as he wanted
as blithely naked as any fantasy
he could ever have concocted;
in fact, he could never have
invented anything in the feverish
activities of his lonely room
to approach her completely natural
approach to his body and hers.

The more he thought about this
wonderful state of affairs,
the more he realized that sex
was not the only area of his life
about which his very early education
had misled him, and he began to discover
that he had natural rhythm and perfect pitch,
and could sing and dance like a star;
that he liked reading, was a passable writer,
was a pretty good student, was reliable,
and that he loved talking to his girlfriend.

He did however retain the ability to blush,
to hesitate, and to speak slowly and look
sideways, and a little bit down.

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About riverwriter

Poet, playwright, duplicate bridge player, website designer, cottager, husband, father, grandfather, former athlete, carpenter, computer helper for my friends, theatre designer, backstage polymath, retired teacher of highschool English, drama, art, a baritone singer in a barbershop quartet, who knows what else? wordcurrents is on Facebook: Doug also has a Facebook page, "Incognitio", related to his novels.
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